Hello, I hope you are doing good.
My name is Mhlengi Jason Nkanzela. I am 20 years of age and I stay in Ntuzuma located in Durban.
I stay with my mother, we actually share a room she rents. It is not easy I tell you. When she takes a bath I have to go outside, I normally wait till she goes to work to take my bath.
I am unemployed and I have massive amounts of anxiety, at this point I just think it’s a disorder. I have a Higher Certificate in IT. I would have liked to further my qualification but NSFAS defunded me. I like to think (self-motivation) that at least I will have to repay less money to NSFAS for the HC rather than a higher qualification which would have costed more to finish. I would like to go back to school and study some more tho and I will pay for my studies.
The thing about me is that I have huge plans, I have suffered a lot so I kinda understand life a lot quicker. I am not a person that quits, and I know this is just a scratch. I will get stronger I will keep on going but for now I just need a push. I need help if I’m being honest.
As a male adult/young adult asking from my mother is depressing and embarrassing really. My father passed on when I was 9 months but it doesn’t bother me that much anymore, I have accepted that some things need to happen in order for others to happen. My mother asked me to move out recently too and that totally crushed me for a while until I understood where she was coming from.
I have massive plans and I will work had into making them a success. I plan to get a place of mine, get peace of mind, deal with the anxiety, get a job, make enough money to repay the student debt, do a higher qualification. I know with that I would have the right basics to take on the world and from there I believe things will start moving in my favour.
I know and understand how no human being is destined to suffer and I plan to help as many people as I can. Human beings need each other if I’m being honest. I do understand that laziness is to root of most issues. I am not lazy, I am a hardworking individual with many odds stacked against him. I will move very subtle as I understood that sometimes it’s okay not to rush.
I can tell you a lot about things I have tried and didn’t work. I will still fail some more that’s for sure but I will never stop trying. I see lessons in failure and not losses. Eventually, the universe will give in and work in my favour.
With the R30 000 I would like to buy a small site, build my room and begin from there with a clear head because I am really stressed in the space I am in currently. I have lost a lot of weight but it’s okay, the journey continues.
Thank you for your time, have a wonderful rest of your day.
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